Dear English Nerds, I hate you alot. When I say alot I mean there is not enough room in this world for you and my hatred of you, so please leave. To be clear, I am not talking about Nerds from England, I am talking about the supergeeks who are responsible for “defining” the English Language.
In the last year, the people that publish the Oxford English Dictionary have added alot of words to the English language. They’ve added hip words like “geek chic”, “phablet” and “digital detox.” They’ve added incredibly awesome words like “food baby”, “buzzworthy” and “fauxhawk.” And how can we “srsly” forget the importance of “selfies” you post of yourself “twerking” to deal with your “FOMO?” Yeah. They’ve added all of those words
The people who put out Merriam-Webster’s dictionary have added “game changer” and “bucket list.” They’ve even added new words like “gassed” and “mash-up”(I thought these were existing words, but I guess I was wrong). They had a real “aha moment” when they decided that “sexting” should make the list.
I guess the bottom line is that alot of words get added to the English language on a pretty regular basis.
Well screw all of you English nerds for not adding the word “alot” to the dictionary. Srsly. If the idiots of today can use srsly in their theses with the firm backing of the institutions who stand at the gates and screen admission to the English Language, I curse every English teacher and English nerd who ever told me that alot is not a word. You guys make me want to vom. Yes, they added vom to the English language. Makes me want to drop the f-bomb alot which is perfectly fine, because f-bomb is also now an official word in the English Language.
So here is my call to action. Please use the word alot alot. Make them add it to the English language. It has alot of uses. Actually I can only see two, but it is used alot already. Alot of people can’t see what I just did there, but you did, don’t you? You have alot of intelligence, if I do say so myself.
In the meantime, thank you English nerds for giving me the words to write this:
The food baby I have developed from my FOMO makes me srsly vom, but selfies of me twerking taken with my phablet make me squee. Apols.